Funny Short Jokes Photos Pictures Images: Funniest Short Jokes

Saturday 13 July 2013

Funniest Short Jokes

Funniest Short Jokes History

Source(google.com.pk)

Two zebras pondering Two zebras are talking and one asks the other, "Am I black with white

stripes or white with black stripes?" The other replies, "Well I don't

know. You should pray to God about that and ask him." So that night he did

and God replied, "You are what you are." The next day he said to the other

zebra, "I still don't understand what I am because God just said, You are

what you are." The second zebra responds, "You must be white with black

stripes or else God would have said, Yo is what yo is."

Golf Jokes are interesting jokes that are associated with the game of golf; however one would need to know atleast a bit about the game in order to get the essence of these jokes.

Golf Joke

Two men were playing golf one afternoon when just as they are about to play an important putt on the final hole for the match a large funeral procession passes by on the road at the side of the golf course. One of the men stops in mid putt, removes his cap, bows his head in prayer. The second man retorts " Gee man, that was really respectful". "Well, we had been married for over 25 years" said the other man.

Golf Jokes

It was a pleasant Sunday morning and four married men are playing a round of

golf. At the 9th hole, the first golfer says

"You don't know what it took for me to

get here this morning. I promised the wife that I would re-paint the whole house

next week."

The second golfer says " I'm in a worse position than you are". I've promised to

put down new decking around the swimming pool".

The third guy says "That's nothing. I've had to design and pay for a state of the art

new kitchen for my wife".

They carry on playng and suddenly realise that the fourth golfer has remained

silent. " What did you have to promise to get out today" they asked. " It's a bit

sensitive. All I can say is that the foundations will be poured for the new extension

on the house next week".

I returned from my normal round of golf late last Sunday and my wife asked me

why I had been so long. "All was fine "I said "until at the 11th hole, George had

a cardiac arrest and died on the spot." "That's terrible" my wife said.

"No kidding for the rest of the round it was a case of hit a shot, drag George, hit

a shot drag George".

Variety Jokes are those which don't fall in to any category or is a mixture of humor on various topics like lawyers, marriage and funny kis.

Lady and the butcher

Lady to butcher: Is that the biggest duck you have?

The butcher not wanting to lose a customer because of this said: No ma'am, we have another bigger one.

He went inside, took a pump and blew some air in the duck to make it look bigger. Then he gave it to the lady.

The lady said: Good, I will have both of them.

Two line jokes

Airhostess to old man: Don't worry sir; there is nothing to be afraid of.

Old man: Thanks, that relieves me; you know I haven't bought a ticket.

Why are fishermen successful in business?

Because they make "net profits"

Patient: Doctor, I feel like a pack of cards.

Psychiatrist: Now you sit still on that chair and don't shuffle about.

Which book you cannot find in a library?

Cheque-books.

Short Humor

Santa: Did you enjoy the boxing match>

Banta: Yes, but it was so cold that even the boxers were wearing gloves.

Santa: Why aren't you using toothpaste?

Banta: Because my tooth isn’t loose.

How does a pony that has caught a cold sound?

A little hoarse

What flower do you get if you cross a dog with a certain vegetable?

Collie-flower

The millionaire husband

Man 1: I became a millionaire after marriage.

Man 2: Wow! Your wife has sure bought lots of luck to you.

Man 1: Actually I was a billionaire before marriage.

Rich Boy's nose cut

A rich but spoilt boy fell in love with a girl and showered her with gifts though she didn't reciprocate his love. Once she was injured and he took her to the hospital, paid the bills and even gave some blood.

But the girl fell in love with someone else and when the boy found this out he shouted at her and asked her to give back all the gifts that he had given. The girl agreed and gave him back the gifts.

The boy by now was insanely angry and shouted: "Well, how about the other thing that I gave you. How are you going to give me back the blood?"

The girl replied nonchalantly: "In monthly installments."